Sick For Christmas

We tried to be jolly.  We tried to follow our traditions.  But there was no way around it, we were sick for Christmas.  Kevin had the stomach flu of death on Christmas Eve and Kylea and I caught a different cold on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day.  

We read The Night Before Christmas on Christmas Eve.  We read the story of Christ's birth from Luke on Christmas morning.  We made tea roll (which no one ate) but we were really not very much into the Christmas celebrating this year.

Despite this, it was still nice to have us all together.  Enjoy this little video of our Christmas.  

And photos too :)

Truth be told,  Mama wasn't really feeling up to making cookies.  Santa wrote a note saying he had been to Iran and Hawaii before our house and he left us a pineapple and some pomegranates.

new frame looks pretty!

Congratulations

Look at him.

handsome right?

And now, to add to his repertoire of accomplishments he is the proud recipient of a Master's in Business Administration.

Congratulations Love!  I am so proud of you!!

Vomit Monster

*warning*  this post contains graphic descriptions of Kylea's first stomach bug....read on at your own risk.

Kylea had her first stomach flu.  I knew she was sick, she had a runny nose, a fever and was being very clingy.  But I had no idea it was a stomach virus.  My first clue was that she wouldn't eat.  Actually, that's not really a very good clue because she really won't eat very much anyway regardless of the day or circumstances.  I tried everything.  I always start with healthy food then I slowly digress until I find something that she will at least put in her mouth.  This particular day we started with turkey and green beans....NOPE!  She wouldn't touch it.  Then I tried rice and canned peaches......no way  jose. "weird", I thought, "that's usually a big hit." Next I tried mashed potatoes......She squeezed her lips shut and defiantly turned her head to the side. Nuh Uh! Not today! "ok, what is going on? She LOVES mashed potatoes."  It's not very healthy but I wanted her to eat something, so my final attempt was her most favorite, chicken nuggets....ok I'll eat that. She hesitantly took the nugget and began nibbling.

I was so relieved that she was finally eating something, her tummy had been grumbling all day. She wouldn't let me put her down in her high chair so I was carrying her around while she nibbled away. As I watched her slowly munch on her chicken nugget my tummy let out a hungry roar.  I realized I had been so pre-ocuppied with a clingy sick baby that I had forgotten to eat myself.  So I grabbed a piece of left over hawaiian pizza from the refrigerator.  I was starving so I took a bite of cold pizza as I walked across the kitchen to grab a plate so I could warm it up.  Little did I know, disaster awaited me.

Mere seconds after taking that bite Kylea started to gag.  I thought she was choking on a piece of chicken nuggets so I reached in her little  mouth to help dislodge the offending nugget when it happened....throw up. Lots of it, all over the ground.  "Oh gross!" I said out loud.  As if right on cue the dog came running in to the kitchen and began trying to lick up the mess.  " Get out! NO!! Yuck!"  then.....more gagging.  I take off sprinting in the direction of the kitchen sink holding Kylea face out in front of me like she's a bomb ready to blow. Just steps before the sink, it happened again, vomit. There was some on the kitchen counter and cabinet but worst of all, most of it landed smack on the head of the dog who was trying to lick the mess off the baby. " Oh no! oh gosh!" I said out loud.  I turned her around to assess the damage and said, "Are you ok baby girl?"  This time without so much as a gag of warning she did it again. I am now dripping in vomit, it puddles on the floor around us. I don't even try to keep the dog from licking it up.

I was so disgusted I was literally shivering.  Just then, my phone starts ringing. It's Kevin.  I answer nearly in tears, soaked in vomit, still trying to keep the dog from licking up the mess on the floor and also attempting to keep him from leaving the kitchen in favor of carpeted areas of the house.  I hang up. We strip off all the vomit soaked clothing right there in the kitchen and leave them in a heap on the floor.  I attempt to clean off major vomit from Dog's head and go straight to the bath.  As I am cleaning up a surprisingly happy Kylea in the bath tub, I peer out of the bathroom door and see the Dog in the living room with all four feet up in the air, rubbing his back on the carpet. He was rolling and writhing like a pig wallowing in mud.  "Oh great."  I say trying to memorize the spot where he rubbed his vomitey self so that I can clean it up later.  Kylea splashes, giggles and, possibly because she thought it was so fun, she practices some gag noises...... so not funny.

I haven't eaten hardly anything in the days since the event.  Part of it has to do with the fact that I also caught the stomach virus (not surprisingly).  Eventually I will be able to stomach food again.  Although, I may never eat pizza again.

Like Big Brother

The sun was shining today and there wasn't a cloud in the sky.  It was simply beautiful.  It's December though which means that clear skies bring frigid temperatures.  It was only 24 degrees when we decided that the call of the outdoors was more than we could withstand today.  We bundled up and went to the community park to stretch our legs and soak in some of God's Prozac (sunshine).  


Kylea squealed with glee down the slide and gave mommy a pretty good workout going up and down it for at least an half hour.  Then we swung on the swings, and checked out a few fall leaves on the ground.

But then Kylea spotted the most intersting and exciting thing of all.  We brought Tekoa along to enjoy the outdoors with us.  He spent most of the time sitting and chewing on bark but suddenly he began wildly digging in the dirt.  He was flinging bark in every direction and digging with both front paws.  Kylea broke into fits of wild  laughter.  What do you do when your big brother is a dog?  You copy him.  Here's a little video of Kylea digging like her fluffy big brother Tekoa.

As a bonus,  today Kylea discovered that if she throws toys or other random finds on the treadmill while mommy is running it flies across the room and smashes into the wall.  She found this to be extremely fascinating and hilarious.  Even more fascinating than the Grinch on the television or the toys I had brought for her. This discovery may lead to disaster. (and a pretty funny story)  Stay tuned for the flying mommy story......hopefully it doesn't come to that:)

Copy Cat

Kylea is picking up on what it means to be a big girl. She loves eating with her brand new big girl Elmo fork, brushes her hair when she finds a brush laying around, she does all of her poo's in her very own potty

She knows hats go on your head 

and she LOVES talking on the phone

Gratitude

The pilgrims were smart.   Can you imagine the hardships they faced?  How many times do we whine when the waiter brings us lukewarm food.  Or the air conditioning isn't quite icy enough.  Or what about those times we are stuck in traffic.  It really seems silly compared to the battle for life and liberty that the pilgrims faced each and every day.  I am thankful that they set the precedent of gratitude.  We get the opportunity to reflect on our blessings, the things that make our life happier and better.  What a tremendous gift they gave us, the gift of gratitude!

As if right on the holiday cue our little one learned another word (she seems to acquire at least one or two a week these days).  Here she is displaying her skills. (and swelling her mommy's heart up with pride.  My 14 month old knows how to be polite!!! And grateful!)

I have so much to be grateful for.  Our lovely new home that we get to own.

My handsome husky dog that is so gentle and loving to the baby and encourages me to get out rain or shine for some exercise every day.

 My beautiful family.  And my handsome, hardworking husband, who I love with all my heart. 

My healthy, happy little girl.  I am thankful that I get to spend the days with her.  Her bright smile and spunky, feisty attitude light up my life.  I am grateful that I get to be the one to teach and influence her each day. I owe that blessing to my hardworking husband, did I mention I love him? I do! 

I hope that your Thanksgiving was filled with reflections on the things that make your life better.  Cheers to the good things in life!

Fat

**** this post was written with lots and lots of emotion in response to an incident that upset me.  Keep that in mind as you continue****

We are bombarded with images like these.  The message is, you are nothing unless you are thin.

I once read that if you want to be a writer, find something that you are passionate about and write it.  I recognize that I am not the most prolific writer out there.  But, I do love to write.  It heals my soul, it helps me sort out my feelings.  Writing, for a girl who struggles to say what she feels, is a way for me to communicate.   When I write I am free, and unencumbered. I feel my messages are better communicated and understood when I write them.  I love to write.


What am I passionate about? I am passionate about my religion.  I know that there is a God in Heaven who knows and loves me.  I am passionate about my family.  I love my family.  I am eternally grateful for the opportunity that I have to be sealed to them for time and eternity.  They are my everything and I take my responsibility of raising and nurturing my child along the path of exaltation very seriously.  Lastly, I am passionate about health. Why? What an odd thing to feel passionately about.  I feel passionately about it because a healthy body is the key to a healthy mind and spirit.


This last passion is the one that I want to talk about today. It is no secret that America's obesity rate is one of the highest in the world (other industrialized nations are not far behind.).  Heart disease, and diabetes are rampant.  These are directly linked to high BMI. What else is rampant?  Depression, anxiety, globalized feelings of unhappiness and discontent.  I spent my college career learning about health promotion and education.  I have read hundreds of studies (real scientific studies and not the factually inaccurate articles published in popular magazines) on how to spread the good news of a healthy lifestyle, not diets and excessive unrealistic exercise plans.  Did you know that metabolic health is more important than weight?  It's true that someone who qualifies as obese on a height weight chart could be more metabolically healthy than someone who is thin.  No popular magazine accurately depicts this.  Metabolic health doesn't sell magazines, I would venture a guess that most people don't even know what that means.  Instead media focus on marketing  "How to lose belly fat" or "How to get washboard abs."  This has nothing to do with being healthy and everything to do with ego.  We are an image obsessed nation.


My goals have been high, my dreams have been big.  I dreamed of changing lives by helping people achieve healthy lives. I have recently learned that my scope has been astoundingly narrow and I am missing the bigger picture of what women really struggle with.  I am unique.  You see, I love to exercise.  I go out in the rain, the snow, the heat.  The burn of my lungs makes me feel alive.  I love competition.  I love the feeling of how accute my senses are right there on the starting line.  My heart thuds in my chest, every fiber of my being is focused on one thing, the race.  When I run I run with my whole heart and soul.  Every race is a battle of my will to push harder than I ever thought I could.  I am by no means a tremendous athlete.  I never come in first, but I love it.


Directly after I gave birth to my beloved little girl and I felt the insidious grip of post partum depression taking me.  I knew there was only one thing I could do.  I put on my running shoes and ever so slowly made my way out on an afternoon constitutional.  I filled my lungs with warm fresh air and lifted my face to the sunshine as I slowly walked.  I love to exercise.


Here's the thing that I have come to understand.  Most women have no experience with exercise or desire to do it.  They don't like to hike or run or swim or climb or sweat.  They didn't spend their childhood and teenage years running cross-country and track and swimming and basketball and volleyball and they didn't sign up for the rock climbing class in high school and college....because they were't interested.


How can someone like me properly motivate someone like that?  I have to really put myself in their shoes.  I have to really try to understand the obstacles they are facing.  They REALLY believe they can't do it.  Not because they are lazy but because they lack experience.


Another thing that I have learned recently is that I am out of step with most women in my attitude toward food.  Many women, I have learned, have a very complicated relationship with their food.  Once, while shopping with a girl friend of mine for some ice cream, I was able to get a glimpse of this relationship. She walked around surveying every carton and informing us of all the evil calories lurking in every tub.  One of the men of the group says, "Who cares!  Why do you even read that stuff?"  she turned and said, "I do!  Every girl does.  I bet you do too don't you Paula."  I stood there feeling awkward, I don't.  I never have.  "Sorry"  I said, "I never worry about the calories.  If I am going to treat myself I realize that it's unhealthy.  Just don't do it too often."  One of my favorite blogs is a cooking blog.  I have noticed in her writing that she many times mentions feelings of shame associated with eating.  These feelings of shame are nonchalantly or even jokingly referred to as if it is a normal part of life and eating.  She has mentioned hiding in the bathroom or in the kitchen before the kids wake up to eat and then feeling horrible about herself.  The part that surprised me, was the widespread nod of approval she receives in the comments section. Women completely identify with this!  There is a very complex relationship between women and food.


One other thing that I have come to realize is, that despite the fact that America is the most obese nation in the world we are WILDLY intolerant of obesity.  I have never been obese or even overweight, I am lucky.  But I also seem to have missed the memo that tells us to be nasty to our brothers and sisters of the world who are overweight.  I was recently spending time with some people who are very dear to me.  I am having a hard time putting in to words how distressing it was for me to hear them express their attitudes towards obesity.


"I have just noticed how many fat people there are here." the word fat was harshly emphasized, spit out like a dirty word. The look on her face was one like she had tasted something disgusting and was longing to wash the flavor out of her mouth.  I stood dumbfounded, nodding in agreement because I wanted to fit in, but my insides were writhing in ANGER.  "How could you?!"  I thought.  "You don't know these women and what they've been through.  How can you stand here spewing so much venom because they are overweight!" My anger boiled and brewed nearly to the point of explosion as the time passed and I endured phrases like, "cow", "heffer" and other crude jokes at the expense of the surrounding people and their weight problems.  The tipping point for me was when she started poking fun at my baby.  I made a worried comment about my baby (who still nurses).  I mentioned that I was worried her father wouldn't know her eating schedule and may not feed her properly while I was away.  The response to my worried comment came all too quickly. The offender simply mentioned that my baby is fat, and could easily live off her fat while I was gone.......as I write this, heat is pouring from my body, tears are stinging my eyes and sprinkling my computer keyboard and I am literally physically shaking.  My daughter is one year old. She is a baby! SHE IS SUPPOSED TO BE CHUBBY!!!!!!  The idea that even a baby isn't immune from our image obsessed society sickens me.  I can't protect her from everything but I will be damned if I don't do my very best to raise a daughter with a positive self image!  


One of the most fantastic women I know shared with me, in a deep confidence, that in her younger days she struggled with anorexia.  When life caught up to her and she couldn't just not eat, she became bulimic.  I was just an elementary schooler then, but I remember very distinctly how this revelation rocked me.  I had learned about those diseases in school.  We had been taught how the constant throwing up decays teeth and how anorexia and bulimia can both lead to death.  Women chose to starve themselves to death. I distinctly remember wondering how and why on earth people would do that to themselves, I didn't understand.  This wonderful and inspirational woman shared her personal battle with me to help me understand that the problem of eating disorders is more widespread than I knew. She wanted me to develop more compassion and she wanted me to know that real people that I love have battled eating disorders.  This woman sought help for her problems and she is no longer bulimic but, she is overweight.  Do you see why I quiver with anger when I see someone look down with hatred in their eyes at someone who is battling a weight issue?  You DO NOT know their story.  You do not know the obstacles they battle.  You are not better than they are.


The CDC labeled obesity an epidemic.  The real epidemic is hate.  We hate each others and make each other feel small and worthless for superficial reasons. But, worst of all, we hate ourselves. Judgment and hatred are shown to those who battle weight issues.  Self loathing and deep self hatred plague  women of all shapes and sizes.  Exercise plans and diets are just a band aids on a festering infected wound called intolerance.  No one wages positive change in their life because they hate themselves.  I am asking, no, I am pleading that everyone who reads this take a deep look inside themselves.  Look inside and carve out the part of yourself that hates.  After you carve it out, look at it, and ask yourself, why? Find compassion and find love.  When you do that, you will find the power to change your life and the world.

HALLOWEEN

I have two things to be grateful for this Halloween.  First it was tons of fun to celebrate this holiday with our little toddler.  She didn't quite understand what was going on but she toddled around and took everything in with great interest.

Second, I love, love, LOVE our new community!  I don't think I've ever lived in a place that felt so unified.  It feels like we're living in a 1950's suburb (or what I imagine it was like back then)  I walk the dog every morning and my neighbors are all out walking, jogging and walking their dogs.  When they pass they always smile and say, "Hi!" There are countless community events some for charity (a 5k to raise money for a family whose son was diagnosed with cancer) or just for fun!  So, we did a lot of Halloween celebrating.  We did a "trunk or treat" with our church and a Halloween village in the community.  On Hallows Eve we turned on some spooky music and danced the night away; the great MJ's "Thriller," Monster Mash, and Ghost Busters.  We took breaks to hand out candy to our very polite and super adorable neighborhood children.

It was SO fun!

Trunk or Treat at the church with cousin Kaydence

Trick or Treat Village

Lately

She's a toddler. Through and through.

   

She explores everything

walks and runs like an old pro

Is acquiring new words every day.  Today she added the words dog and baby to her vocabulary.

She likes to practice her new words while she should be sleeping.  She woke up at 3am sat up in her crib and said, "no, nooo, no!........bye, bye!" her two favorites.  When she was done practicing she stood up looked across the room and said, "MaaaMaaa"

She has become extremely expressive.  We are well acquainted with this face.  I like to call it her business face.

She knows baby sign language.

She loves drawers and cupboards.

She has become accustomed to her schedule and holds me to it!  She walks to her potty when she wakes up in the morning. She runs to get the dog's leash after breakfast, holds her arms up and asks to nurse when it's nap time and runs to the bathroom after dinner gleefully shouting, "Baaa!  Baa!" (bath)

Books are her favorite toys ever.  She grabs a book and then backs up into the lap of anyone who will sit down with her....including the dog.

She knows pigs say oink, owls say whoo, and dogs say wooo.  Ask her, she'll gladly demonstrate her skills and then clap for herself afterward.  

She knows how to nuzzle her way into our hearts.

Photographic Tour of First Birthday Festivities!

ummmm...why did you all simultaneously burst into song whilst staring and smiling at ME??

step 1 of epic first birthday mess