Vomit Monster

*warning*  this post contains graphic descriptions of Kylea's first stomach bug....read on at your own risk.

Kylea had her first stomach flu.  I knew she was sick, she had a runny nose, a fever and was being very clingy.  But I had no idea it was a stomach virus.  My first clue was that she wouldn't eat.  Actually, that's not really a very good clue because she really won't eat very much anyway regardless of the day or circumstances.  I tried everything.  I always start with healthy food then I slowly digress until I find something that she will at least put in her mouth.  This particular day we started with turkey and green beans....NOPE!  She wouldn't touch it.  Then I tried rice and canned peaches......no way  jose. "weird", I thought, "that's usually a big hit." Next I tried mashed potatoes......She squeezed her lips shut and defiantly turned her head to the side. Nuh Uh! Not today! "ok, what is going on? She LOVES mashed potatoes."  It's not very healthy but I wanted her to eat something, so my final attempt was her most favorite, chicken nuggets....ok I'll eat that. She hesitantly took the nugget and began nibbling.

I was so relieved that she was finally eating something, her tummy had been grumbling all day. She wouldn't let me put her down in her high chair so I was carrying her around while she nibbled away. As I watched her slowly munch on her chicken nugget my tummy let out a hungry roar.  I realized I had been so pre-ocuppied with a clingy sick baby that I had forgotten to eat myself.  So I grabbed a piece of left over hawaiian pizza from the refrigerator.  I was starving so I took a bite of cold pizza as I walked across the kitchen to grab a plate so I could warm it up.  Little did I know, disaster awaited me.

Mere seconds after taking that bite Kylea started to gag.  I thought she was choking on a piece of chicken nuggets so I reached in her little  mouth to help dislodge the offending nugget when it happened....throw up. Lots of it, all over the ground.  "Oh gross!" I said out loud.  As if right on cue the dog came running in to the kitchen and began trying to lick up the mess.  " Get out! NO!! Yuck!"  then.....more gagging.  I take off sprinting in the direction of the kitchen sink holding Kylea face out in front of me like she's a bomb ready to blow. Just steps before the sink, it happened again, vomit. There was some on the kitchen counter and cabinet but worst of all, most of it landed smack on the head of the dog who was trying to lick the mess off the baby. " Oh no! oh gosh!" I said out loud.  I turned her around to assess the damage and said, "Are you ok baby girl?"  This time without so much as a gag of warning she did it again. I am now dripping in vomit, it puddles on the floor around us. I don't even try to keep the dog from licking it up.

I was so disgusted I was literally shivering.  Just then, my phone starts ringing. It's Kevin.  I answer nearly in tears, soaked in vomit, still trying to keep the dog from licking up the mess on the floor and also attempting to keep him from leaving the kitchen in favor of carpeted areas of the house.  I hang up. We strip off all the vomit soaked clothing right there in the kitchen and leave them in a heap on the floor.  I attempt to clean off major vomit from Dog's head and go straight to the bath.  As I am cleaning up a surprisingly happy Kylea in the bath tub, I peer out of the bathroom door and see the Dog in the living room with all four feet up in the air, rubbing his back on the carpet. He was rolling and writhing like a pig wallowing in mud.  "Oh great."  I say trying to memorize the spot where he rubbed his vomitey self so that I can clean it up later.  Kylea splashes, giggles and, possibly because she thought it was so fun, she practices some gag noises...... so not funny.

I haven't eaten hardly anything in the days since the event.  Part of it has to do with the fact that I also caught the stomach virus (not surprisingly).  Eventually I will be able to stomach food again.  Although, I may never eat pizza again.