Quin's Birth Story

There's only one sure way to get this face from a person you are talking to.

Or to turn a friendly conversation into an awkward one.

Just mention  you are planning a HOME BIRTH....dun, dun, dun!!!

I imagine the thoughts that everyone has are different but all land somewhere in between believing that what you have chosen to do is either crazy or reckless or maybe even a little bit of both.

I admit that I once shared that attitude.  In fact, looking back on this blog, during my first pregnancy I put a great deal of time into considering wether it was crazy to decide to give birth without an epidural.

I'm not opposed to a hospital birth.  In fact, I selected a qualified midwife who was extensively qualified and who supported home birth because we believe that in healthy pregnancies and under qualified care it is safe and beautiful. She also believes in using the resources available at the hospital if there are complications during birth.  This attitude is not the case with every midwife and the title midwife can be assigned to practitioners with a huge variety of training.  Under the care of an unqualified midwife early warning signs of trouble are sometimes ignored and laboring mothers are sometimes transferred when it's too late.  Rule number one of home birth, select a qualified professional to assist you in your journey through pregnancy, birth and beyond.

Our midwife's name is Marvelys Lopez.  She's a beautiful woman with a passion for providing options to women for their pregnancy and birth.  I immediately loved her calm nature and I could see that I would feel comfortable in her care.  She also came with a laundry list of credentials that put Kevin's mind at ease, too.

Quin's Birth

For several weeks I had long bouts of irregular contractions.  They usually came after midnight and left by the time the sun came up.  I have a high tolerance for pain so I wasn't in terrible pain but I was pretty exhausted physically and mentally.  Quin's due date came and went I waddled around every day hoping that maybe this would be the day.

At about 4 o'clock on October 9th I decided to get out of bed and start timing the contractions that I was having because they seemed to be coming with some consistency.  I was right!  

They were coming about 8 minutes apart.  My water hadn't broken yet and everyone was still sleeping, since it was only 5 o'clock in the morning so I had a minute or two where I debated on wether I should call Marve or not.  I decided that I better give her a call since she lives about an hour from me so that she could make preparations and make it here in time!

From then until about 7 o'clock I walked around pausing to breath through contractions and made the girls some breakfast.  Kylea was THRILLED to discover that today was the day that baby brother would be born

(Video of kyky)

She squeaked and squealed with glee all morning.  I gave the girls big hugs and kisses and sent them on their way to a good friend's house where they could play and wait until after baby was born.  

For just a brief moment, I was home alone.  It was quiet and still.  I wandered upstairs to where the birth pool was filling

I picked up the teeny tiny diaper that I had laid out and the little bitty jammies and blankets laid out

Last I passed a framed photo on my night stand 3 photos side by side.  One of Kylea, one of Neila and one ultrasound photo of our baby boy.  

In a rush, I could see the moment that was coming. That moment when you hold your brand new child in your arms and you're filled with love and wonder.  I let myself have a little moment.  I pictured our boy's arrival and a tear or two may have escaped.  It wasn't long before Kevin was back with me again.

At about 8:30am my excellent team of midwives arrived.  Marvelys and her two students Erica and Johanna swooped in and turned my room into a functioning birth suite.  My contractions were fluctuating between 5 minutes and 2 minutes by this point so it was suggested that I take a little walk to help move things along.  

What a feeling!  It was a beautiful, calm, desert morning.  The sun was shining warmly in the sky and maybe it was my focus on my labor but everything felt more still than usual.  Was the world holding it's breath?  Did even nature know what we would be receiving this morning? I didn't have to walk very far before the contractions really ramped up in intensity  I found myself hanging onto Kevin's back to breath through the last while my birth team applied pressure to my hips.   By this point the warm water of the birth pool sounded like the only place on earth that I wanted to be, so we turned around and walked home pausing a few more times to hang on Kevin's back while one of the midwives applied pressure to my hips.

By the time we made it back home I didn't realize it at the time, but my body was urging me to push.  Kevin helped me make my way up the stairs and into the birth pool.  

The warm water was exceptionally comforting and with the next contraction I allowed myself to push.  The world disappeared as my vision tunneled down and softly I could hear the song I had set on repeat, "I wish you out of the woods and into a picture, with me..."  I also heard the midwives exclaim, "that's pushing!!"  and in a flash they were all there like a fleet of angels applying cold wash cloths, perineum support and encouragement.  

My primary support, as always, was Kevin.  Afterward I learned that to sit by my head the way he was he had to sit in a permanent squat position and he was sore the next day. What a guy!

  After a couple pushes I was feeling a bit overwhelmed the pressure was INTENSE.  I reached down to see if we had made any progress, "head! there's a head?!" I breathlessly exclaimed.  I was shocked!  Everyone encouraged me to take a deep breath and relax.  I did my best.  During one push I felt a burst of pressure relief and found myself exclaiming, "What was that?!"  Marvelys calmly explained that my water had broken and that there was a little meconium and not to worry.  Frankly, I was so relieved at how much pressure was relieved that I hadn't even thought to worry about the baby passing his first stool prior to birth. Kevin continued to encourage me through the last few pushes, "That's it, Lovey, just breath him down."

At 9:49am Pacific Western Time little Quin Teancum Hart was born.  

There it was, the love.  I stroked his little head and noticed blond hair a button nose and loads of delicious baby rolls.  So beautiful.  Have you ever seen anything so perfect?  He looked a lot like Kylea.   

Some worry set in as we realized that he wasn't respirating properly our little boy was a pale purple color and with the exception of a half hearted squawk he wasn't crying.  A hat was put on his head and  a dry receiving blanket (which were periodically switched out as they became wet)  The birth team set to work with oxygen and a tiny device that measured his oxygenation.  

(Kevin's holding the oxygen hose)

We were made aware that if his condition didn't improve we would need to be transported to the hospital.  "Give him a blessing, Please."  I asked Kevin.  So right there, Kevin laid his hands on our brand new baby's head and gave him a blessing of health.  

With oxygen, Quin's color improved and so did his oxygenation levels.  Kevin got a chance to hold him skin to skin while I got out.  The plan was to take a shower, but I had lost a lot of blood and sat in the hot water for so long that when I attempted to stand I nearly fainted.  So instead of a warm shower I laid down in the bed to rest.  Over the next couple hours of cuddling and singing (apparently babies who are slow to respond initially showed greatest success when parents sang to them as opposed to talking) to Quin he improved.  By the second hour he was completely weaned from the oxygen and it was time to get some measurements!

As he was picked up to be weighed and measured he began to fuss for the first time since his birth.  "I know, I know." cooed the midwife.  "You're happiest with your mama.  It's all you know.  But I'm just gonna tick you off a little so we can get those lungs working!"  

He weighed 9lbs4oz and was 20 1/2 inches long.  Everything about him was perfectly healthy. 

After being off the oxygen for measurements he was monitored again and found that he was regulating his oxygen levels independently. He finally had the strength open his little eyes and look around a little bit. He very peacefully stared up at me and Kevin. 

One of the midwives marveled at the difference between what was accomplished with this home birth and how the same situation would have been handled in a hospital environment.  In the hospital, he would have been whisked away from me and put in the NICU where he would have received care until he was stable and then likely kept for a few more hours of observation until we would have been reunited again.  Having experienced this before, I can say it's traumatizing.  

I feel so blessed that we were able to bring this sweet baby into the world in such a beautiful, peaceful environment.  I feel incredibly blessed that the first moments of his life were spent enjoying each other and honoring the bond that has already been forged, through 9 months of hard work.  I know it was because of blessings and prayers that our sweet boy is here and healthy and thriving.  

Before the birth team left the birth pool was dismantled, medical supplies were packed the room went from birth suite to bedroom once again.  The stage was set.  Kevin went to pick up the girls.

Kylea burst up the stairs first and ran to the side of the bed.  "Where's the baby?!"  she exclaimed.  I situated her next to me on the bed where she could see him.  In a tender and very unexpected moment Kylea's little eyes filled with tears, "Is that my brother?"  she whispered in awe.  Neila followed she cooed and awed and declared him to be "a-doe-able" found his hair and nose and eyes and fingers.  And I sat filled with the most inexplicable feeling of love and fulfillment.  I love this family of ours.